We started to see Sage for couples therapy at what we thought was the end of our marriage, as a last act of desperation. We were stuck in a really destructive pattern. Going into therapy felt horribly vulnerable. But, Sage has the remarkable ability to acknowledge all the emotions in the room, to validate one person without criticizing the other. She can organize the chaos, to allow pain to exist and then morph into kindness and gentleness. We were each able to feel heard, and now can hear each other. I’m sorry we waited so long to do it, but grateful we are where we are now.
” My wife and I have had marital issues throughout our long marriage. Twice we tried “marriage counseling” to no avail. We didn’t understand the problem, let alone have a solution.
After some research, we decided that EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) made the most sense, particularly because I was impressed with how Sage explained EFT and her manner on the phone interview. We therefore had high expectations.
To say those expectations have been greatly exceeded is a understatement. Even though we’ve not completed our therapy, Sage has changed a tense and a generally “not fun” marriage into one that’s enjoyable, where, emotionally, my wife and I are now growing together after many long years.
While it’s tempting to give credit to EFT, and surely it deserves some, there is no doubt that Sage, masterful, challenging and fun, has been the key.
She has an uncanny ability to burrow deep into our emotions, encouraging (never pushing) us into depths we’ve seldom explored, both individually and interacting as a couple. For two people that seldom cry, Sage has us crying more sessions than not. It’s quite therapeutic.
In early sessions, she armed us with techniques to prevent casual arguments spiraling into full out fights. She then drew out, both individually and as a couple, the emotional scars preventing us from connecting. Once drawn out, these scars could be dealt with, although without Sage, it would not have been possible.
The difference in our marriage after maybe 15 sessions is amazing. We now refer to the time when our marriage had issues as “pre-Sage”.
Never critical, always encouraging, but amazingly perceptive to our moods and even facial expressions, Sage misses nothing with her seemingly casual but laser like focus. She combines an incredible ability to push us into areas we’re reluctant to, but must venture. At the same time , she is exceedingly encouraging and supportive.
It’s difficult for us to believe there is someone better than Sage at her profession. We consider ourselves very lucky to have found her”
A (now) happily long-time married couple.
Our first marriage counselor was too direct which caused my husband to become defensive and quit. Our second quit us, right before I was going to –claiming he brought us as far as he was able. Then my personal therapist recommended we find someone who specialized in Emotional Focused Therapy. We randomly chose Sage and walked in her office broken, hopeless and proclaimed we would give her one year. Our marriage was hanging on by a thread.
Sage is compassionate, kind, caring –everything you would expect and want in a marriage counselor. What makes her special is her ability to hold each person’s heart both separate and as a couple. She gives each person a voice, holds you accountable in a loving way and gently guides you to a safer, healthier place. She genuinely loves her work, believes in Emotional Focus Therapy and is very skilled. She transformed two skeptics, on very shaky ground, by educating us to prioritize and opened space for us to be vulnerable with each other. We learned to give and accept forgiveness and in the process heal hurtful wounds. We are both grateful for her direction, guidance and patience, but most of all for illuminating our path in a powerful and motivating way. She’s enabled us to grow as a couple…by her accepting and loving us both for who we are and believing in our ability to change and grow!
Blog to come…